Before Marriage and After Marriage

 Jokes  No Responses »
Aug 282008
 

Before marriage…..

He: Yes. At last. It was so hard to wait.
She: Do you want me to leave?

He: No! Don’t even think about it.
She: Do you love me?

He: Of course! Over and over!
She: Have you ever cheated on me?

He: No! Why are you even asking?
She: Will you kiss me?

He: Every chance I get.
She: Will you hit me?

He: Are you crazy! I’m not that kind of person!
She: Can I trust you?

He: Yes.
She: Darling!

After marriage….
Simply read from bottom to the top.

Dating Vs Marriage

 Jokes  No Responses »
Aug 202008
 

When you are dating…..
Farting is never an issue.
When you are married ….
You make sure there’s nothing flammable near your husband at all times.

When you are dating…..
He takes you out to have a good time.
When you are married ….
He brings home a 6 pack, and says “What are you going to drink?”

When you are dating…..
He holds your hand in public.
When you are married ….
He flicks your ear in public.

When you are dating…..
A Single bed for 2 isn’t THAT bad.
When you are married ….
A King size bed feels like an army cot.

When you are dating…..
Continue reading »

Just to Laugh

 Jokes  No Responses »
Aug 182008
 
  1. A  FOOLish man tells a woman to STOP talking, but a WISE man  tells her that she looks extremely BEAUTIFUL when her LIPS are  CLOSED.
  2. One GOOD way to REDUCE Alcohol consumption :
    Before  Marriage - Drink whenever you are SAD,
    After Marriage – Drink whenever you  are HAPPY
  3. Three FASTEST means of Communication.
    1.  Tele-Phone
    2.  Tele-Vision
    3.  Tell to Woman
    Need  still FASTER – Tell her NOT to tell ANY ONE.
  4. Love your friends not their sisters. Love your sisters not their friends.
  5. A  man got 2 wishes from GOD. He asked for the Best wine and  Best Woman.
    Next  moment, he had the Best Wine and Mother Teresa next to him.
    Moral: BE SPECIFIC
  6. What is a BEST and WORST news you can hear at the SAME time ?
    It  is when your Girl Friend says YOU are the BEST KISSER among all your Friends.
  7. Let us be generous like this : Four Ants are moving through a forest.
    They  see an ELEPHANT coming towards them. Ant 1 says : we should  KILL him.
    Ant  2 says : No, Let us break his Leg alone. Ant 3 says : No, we  will just  throw him away from our path.
    Ant 4 says : No, we will LEAVE  him because  he is ALONE and we are FOUR.
  8. If you do NOT have a Girl Friend – You are missing SOME thing in your life.
    If you HAVE a Girl Friend – You are missing EVERY thing in your  life.
  9. Question: When do you CONGRATULATE someone for their  MISTAKE.
    Answer: On their MARRIAGE.
  10. When your LIFE is in DARKNESS, PRAY GOD and ask him to free you from  Darkness.
    Even after you pray, if U R still in Darkness -  Please PAY  the  ELECTRICITY BILL.
  11. Why Government do NOT allow a Man to MARRY 2 Women.
    Because per Constitution,  you can NOT PUNISH TWICE for the same Mistake.